For those who have read New Moon of the Twilight saga, how many of you can related to what Bella's going through?
Despite all the sappiness of not being able to move on and not wanting to forget, drifting to and fro between the two who makes her feel alive, I do feel her.
Have you ever want to forget something so bad that you wished it never existed, but yet on the other hand you're thankful that you've been given the opportunity even for that slightest moment. As time passes, each memory is still fresh and everything feels like it was just yesterday when in reality it has been years. Despite moving on to new found happiness, yet still holding on to the memories. How Bella's heart ached every time she is reminded of something related to the Cullens or Edward. The sore, the hurt, the angst, the fear. Being in a place all so familiar, hoping to see the one, hoping time would turn back to relive the moments. Wanting to know about the person, wanting to hear the name. But yet afraid that it will cause an emotional stir inside when the waves have been calmed.
I understand why she feels the emptiness, why the hurt, why the yearning.
She never had the answer, the reason of everything that has happened.
If only she knew why truly left from the beginning, perhaps she wouldn't feel as empty and as hurt.
Or maybe, one just have to be absolutely rational in looking further ahead for the consequences and chain of reactions from just one step.
If it didn't happen, it wouldn't have hurt.
But if it didn't hurt, one would never have learn.
After all these years, would you rather know the brutal truth, or prefer to stick to your own assumptions for the perfect memory?
Despite all the sappiness of not being able to move on and not wanting to forget, drifting to and fro between the two who makes her feel alive, I do feel her.
Have you ever want to forget something so bad that you wished it never existed, but yet on the other hand you're thankful that you've been given the opportunity even for that slightest moment. As time passes, each memory is still fresh and everything feels like it was just yesterday when in reality it has been years. Despite moving on to new found happiness, yet still holding on to the memories. How Bella's heart ached every time she is reminded of something related to the Cullens or Edward. The sore, the hurt, the angst, the fear. Being in a place all so familiar, hoping to see the one, hoping time would turn back to relive the moments. Wanting to know about the person, wanting to hear the name. But yet afraid that it will cause an emotional stir inside when the waves have been calmed.
I understand why she feels the emptiness, why the hurt, why the yearning.
She never had the answer, the reason of everything that has happened.
If only she knew why truly left from the beginning, perhaps she wouldn't feel as empty and as hurt.
Or maybe, one just have to be absolutely rational in looking further ahead for the consequences and chain of reactions from just one step.
If it didn't happen, it wouldn't have hurt.
But if it didn't hurt, one would never have learn.
After all these years, would you rather know the brutal truth, or prefer to stick to your own assumptions for the perfect memory?
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